Day 18: 30-Day Gratitude Challenge

You are what you think

​I hope you all had a great Monday. Today, my thankfulness is a continuation of what happened yesterday.

Was supposed to go for lunch with a couple from church, but there was a slight 'booking' misunderstanding, and so I ended up going home straight after church. On the way, I decided to pick a few items from the supermarket. The new plan was to eat, take a nap, and just relax.

That didn’t happen, for I ended up at my neighbour’s house! We chatted over cups of tea and buns for almost 6 hours! Yep, a good six hours of nothing but good old-fashioned talk: no phone, no TV, just talking, laughter and reflections. How we did that, I don’t know, but I’m so grateful for such kind of people who can connect with you on that level. We don’t do this often, and as much as we love talking, we also embrace those moments of quietness and sometimes switch off completely so we can recharge. But yesterday was something else. Our topics of conversation flowed from God, religion, dreams, hopes, past experiences, clothes, movies, and the like. 

Afternoon Tea at the Ritz London

​We’d initially planned to visit York by train next week, but decided against the idea for the time being. Still, afternoon tea was on the agenda. My neighbour knows places and has wined and dined with the rich and famous in her lifetime, despite her humble disposition. We shifted our focus to long term plans, and one of them involves travelling to the Ritz, London for Afternoon Tea. Feeling very proud of our vision, we touched on what to wear, as she demonstrated how one ought to stir the tea when you’re in that environment. We even changed accents for the sake of it, lifted pinkie fingers as we raised teacups, preparing for the day when we’ll turn up there. When will it happen, who knows?​

But it was so lovely to be able to transport ourselves into dreamland and give ourselves something to look forward to, even though we sometimes mourn about finances. However, we never doubted that we will certainly do it. I came home feeling inspired. Our role play seemed to do the trick, for today, I ended up receiving an unexpected gift from another good friend of mine who had invited son over to their house for a sleepover. Our boys have been friends since nursery. Not only did they spoil my son over the weekend since today was a Bank Holiday, but he also turned up with such a lovely Thai Spa scented candle from Parks, London. It’s exquisite and smells gorgeous. The scent and packaging speak exclusivity. I was beyond words, and a part of me wanted to say, “I don’t deserve this.”

I’m glad that I stopped myself, and embraced the rather posh gift, and believe that I’m worth it. I am learning that what you speak or think can have a significant impact on your life, positive vibes will attract positivity.  Being a grateful being is opening more doors than I ever thought possible.  What I’ve mentioned today is just a snapshot of the fantastic experiences I’ve had recently. 

There’s something about our upbringing that taught us to be humble to be blessed. There’s wisdom in that, but over time, I’ve realised that the more you tell yourself that good things happen to others, and not yourself, the less you’ll see opportunities come by. Yesterday, my friend and I didn’t talk about our limitations or financial struggles. We talked about going to the Ritz for tea and strongly agreed that we can do it. Any other person would have quickly dismissed that idea as crazy, after all, we’d just cancelled a day trip to York because of budgeting constraints, now you’re talking of the Ritz? 

Two Types of Givers

My other friend who gave me this lovely candle knows my situation very well, and it’s not the first time she’s done amazing things for the children and me. Think cricket lessons, piano lessons, day trips, sleepovers and so much more, her family have been there for us. The first time I sat down and opened my heart about some of my struggles, and what I was hoping to achieve, she didn’t see the limitations. She chose to focus on where I was going, not what I’d endured along the way. She’s always treated us according to what we deserve not what we have…

Recently discussed a butterfly analogy and the concept of giving with someone, based on a sermon I once listened to years ago. The message was so paramount that it never left me. T.D. Jakes touched on two types of givers; one who will throw bits and pieces on the floor, so that you can crawl towards whatever they give you, and never rise above the ground. They want to keep you there, period. Maybe it makes them feel better, but all the same, these are the kinds of people who bring out the worm in you. They are the kind of people who will break your wings if they had to, so that you'll always be dependant upon them. You see, some people derive happiness out of being needed.

Then there’s another giver who sees what’s in you and can envision the bigger picture despite your current limitations. They understand that you’re transitioning and that it’s a process. When they help you, you don’t feel ashamed, and when they help, their focus is on elevating and stretching you so that you can reach potential. These are the people who will speak positivity, despite the outlook. They set you free, in so many ways than one. 

Conclusion

I am blessed to be surrounded by people who see the best in me, and treat me as if my children and I are worthy. They don’t shame me, and indeed, do not throw morsels on the ground, or seek joy out of the fact that I am begging. Thank you, Lord, for the people who bring out the butterfly out of the caterpillar in me.

How about you? Can you think of anyone who treats you like gold, even if reality says you’re a nobody? Let us be thankful for such amazing beings who love you as you are. They can visualise who you are going to be in the future, and prepare you for a future that they know you deserve. 

I will be praying that they may receive and experience more blessings in their lives because they are such a blessing to ours. 

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